tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3039321608208914582.post237066668149597675..comments2023-10-15T08:19:28.285-07:00Comments on Am I a Frum Feminist?: I - Do or Don't? - Wanna Grow UpAmIaFrumFeministhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09336007889420058137noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3039321608208914582.post-58191383792272178132008-02-12T23:42:00.000-08:002008-02-12T23:42:00.000-08:00I don't think that it's impossible for a couple to...I don't think that it's impossible for a couple to grow together, but it will take a lot of very hard work and can make a marriage very stressful, something which I would like to forgo if at all possible. <BR/><BR/>You're right about outgrowing friends; I know exactly what you mean. But a spouse and a friend is not the same thing; while you can outgrow a friend, you have a responsibility to your spouse to ensure that you DON'T outgrow them. You have to do everything in your power to make sure that the two of you stick together, "through thick and thin." That's where the, "really difficult marriage" part comes in...<BR/><BR/>Concerning your second point: this is something that I've been planning to blog about but haven't had a chance. Is it possible for a frum woman to have more than one purpose? If a woman is not married, obvious her purpose is something other than marriage. Obviously Hashem intends something else for her. <BR/><BR/>It needs some thought. I have a "rough draft" for that post and I have to get cracking on it. <BR/><BR/>Thanks for posting! I really enjoyed your blog!AmIaFrumFeministhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09336007889420058137noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3039321608208914582.post-85701549462904165042008-02-12T16:13:00.000-08:002008-02-12T16:13:00.000-08:00You are so right! Here is the problem with "growin...You are so right! <BR/><BR/>Here is the problem with "growing together." Once a woman is married, she (usually)has to pay bills, look after kids, and answer to a husband. These things prevent her from doing things like traveling, pursuing higher education, making career changes that require her to forgo immediate profit. You need a certain amount of independence and self-knowledge to make an informed decision about whom you marry. If I had married at 19, I would have married a total nerd because that's all that's around and I would have been too young to know better. A good marriage is based on giving. Someone who is not complete as an individual often has little to give to another person. People who marry too young risk outgrowing their spouses. Do you have any idea how many friends I have outgrown because we both changed with age and the things that initially drew us together are no longer there?<BR/><BR/>On the OTHER had,singlehood is not a natural state for any adult, however that may be defined. The entirety of a frum woman's purpose in this world is performed within the structure of marriage-challah, nidda, taharas hamishpacha, encouraging her husband to learn, etc. Any growth she can achieve as a single pales in comparison to this.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3039321608208914582.post-16582110013999881042008-01-22T14:10:00.000-08:002008-01-22T14:10:00.000-08:00I actually got one of Potok's books from the libra...I actually got one of Potok's books from the library a few weeks ago but didn't get around to reading it. I've been told that they're very good.AmIaFrumFeministhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09336007889420058137noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3039321608208914582.post-47203773829305728692008-01-21T21:25:00.000-08:002008-01-21T21:25:00.000-08:00tradition takes on modernity in the battle of the ...tradition takes on modernity in the battle of the millennium....get it now on pay-per-view. <BR/><BR/>read chaim potoks books....start with davitas harp, i have a feeling ull like him. <BR/><BR/>-rembrandtAnonymousnoreply@blogger.com